I *LIKE* Being Old!

Well, let me correct that. I *LIKE* have 60 years of memories to draw from. I *DON'T* like it that my body is aging and showing wear and tear from my not taking care of it.

I like being in a idea-rich environment such as college. I am able to give first-hand accounts of events that to others in the class are ancient history! (Sometimes I wish I had paid more attention to what was the same old boring news but is now History.) I like the ability to pull ideas from my experience and show how they can apply in other situations. (I have no specific examples off-hand.) I like not being afraid of my teachers so that I can interject ideas as I see fit! My teachers all seem, if not receptive to my comments, at least tolerant. I am able to express my smart-alecky streak!

I remember a comment by a speaker at a business meeting. He said that when he said "Good morning" to a business group, they responded "Good morning." When he said it to a college group, they took notes!

(I told the staff at the North Carolina Aquarium where I volunteer that I don't like people, but I like learning stuff and I like showing off what I know. It works out. :-) That is not quite true. I sometimes work hard at getting a pre-school child to touch something in the touch tank. I have them touch a dry, empty shell, then a wet, empty shell, then a wet shell with a critter in it, and sometimes they even touch the critter -- a hermit crab, whelk, or something like that. I get quite a sense of accomplishment. A heart-felt "thank you" from the mom makes me feel really good!)

Looking back on my life I seem to have had a rather conventional life. I have been a white-collar wage-slave (corporate employee) for most of my life, been married, had a child, house, cars, etc. Yet my experiences (I include reading and paying attention to the world around me as experiences.) are sufficiently broad and deep that I am able to contribute. This does not make me special as all the other students, and especially the teachers, bring their own experiences to bear. I guess I am trying to say that I am just happy that I have something useful to share and that I am still learning.

Happy Holidays everyone!

My Grades This Semester

When I registered, I signed up for a couple of things that I wouldn't have if I had known better. I took Public Speaking as what is called a mini-course. That is a complete course done in 1/2 a semester. I signed up for 17 credits, but doing one course as a mini was like taking 20 credits the first half and 14 credits the 2nd half. I won't do THAT again!

I also took a Pre-calculus which is what I wanted. It turns out that it is a complete semester of algebra and a complete semester of trig in one course. Since it was a review I could generally keep up with the material, but there sure was a lot of homework! No more double courses, thank you!

As I mentioned on Facebook, I got a C in Public Speaking because I did not turn in an assignment. This was the course that was done as a mini-session.

I got B's in Pre-calculus and Expository Writing (freshman English, part I). The final was a "common final". In our 50 minute class period we had to write a 5-paragraph essay comparing and contrasting two articles that we received a few weeks before. The essay had to have a particular format as well, including a "thesis statement" as the last sentence of the first paragraph. We spent the intervening class time reviewing these essays. (One was Al Gore's Nobel speech.) The teacher worked hard at getting us ready. I got a 97 on mine -- I missed some commas! The dang things are so small that you wouldn't think they were so important!

I got A's in Psychology and Critical Thinking. Our Critical Thinking teacher spent most of his time trying to prove there was a god and rambling about other pet peeves. I argued with him a little and got a boost for "class participation." I had done some reading about psychology before, so that class went pretty easily for me.

I am on break until January when I will take Calculus, Intro to American Lit, and Argument-based research (Freshman English part II). This is a much lighter load than last semester.

The math classes are a test for myself. With all the drinking I did, did I fry my brain so much that I can't do math? Passing Calculus will be the test. Since I was able to keep up with the Pre-calculus, I do not expect any problems as long as I do the work. I was also worried about having pickled my memory cells. Since I passed all my courses, I didn't hurt my memory *too* badly. I feel better about myself.

And that's the news from Lake Greenfield (A lake downtown complete with alligators!)

Happy Holidays to all!

Feeling Angry, AGAIN!

This time I felt it in Critical Thinking class. Part of the issue is the teacher, his methods, and his beliefs. He believes that everything about Aristotle is Good, and deviations from Aristotelian thought is Bad, especially as relates to philosophy. He uses his knowledge and position to vent his anger at modern philosophers, especially those that advocate relative or subjective reality. I get angry at being badgered by him, not that I support subjective reality.

I also get angry at the Aristotelian teachings. He (Aristotle) presents a view of the universe that is incompatible with mine. For instance, there is a supposedly real ideal chair, which every material chair tries to become. There is no need, in my mind, for such an ideal as an actual, if insubstantial, thing. We humans may choose to consider the nature of chair-ness, but these thoughts are strictly our own creation, there is no real manifestation of such a thought. (Except as the bio-chemo-electo-processes of our brains.) I think I want to jump in and straighten everyone out! The problem with that is that I have other plans and limited time and resources.

BTW, if I sit on a rock, does it switch from trying to be a rock to trying to be a chair? How does it "try" to become an ideal rock or chair? How does it know what the ideal is? All kinds of questions....

Thanks for reading....

Ar-r-r-r-r-rgh!

I am angry. I am very, very angry. I was assigned a reading in my English class named "This Way for the Gas, Ladies and Gentlemen." It is a holocaust story. Some years ago I read a book by Frankel. I don't remember the name or much about it, but it was also took place in a camp. I recall some kind of pride, or honor, or something that made things seem OK somehow. In this short story the narrator collaborated to some extent, and was furious about what he did, furious that the Germans had put him in that position, and furious at the victims for being victims. He sought some kind of redeeming quality in himself to make him better than all this.

This makes me angry because one people could do this to another, and to crush still others by making them cooperate. I am angry that we, the western nations, did nothing to stop it. "Peace in our time." I am angry that we did not learn our lesson and let it happen again in Africa. I am angry that even though we intervened in the breakup of Yugoslavia we allowed so much murder and brutality before we intervened.

I am angry that even though we say that we will never let this happen again, we get comfortable, look the other way, make excuses, and wish the problem would go away. They say that those who do not learn history's lessons are doomed to repeat them. We haven't learned.

I am angry that there are so many things in this world that need fixing. There are more serious problems than one person can even learn about, much less do anything about. In the book

Life 101 : Everything We Wish We Had Learned About Life in School -- But Didn't Peter McWilliams said that, yes, there are more problems than one person can handle, but there are many people, each have as their dream to fix a problem. I need to work on my dream and let them work on their dreams. I don't have to fix every problem but I do have to work on a problem. That thought usually keeps me cool.

But, every once in a while, I read or see something that blows my stack, and I just HAVE to vent. Thank you all for listening.

With Knowledge Comes Authority and Responsibility. True?

With knowledge comes authority and responsibility, or so says my teacher in Critical Thinking. He uses the example of being at a family function and many of the kids were in the pool or the hot tub. A thunderstorm started. He knows that lightning can strike within 25 miles of the storm center and that lightning can travel through water. He yelled at the kids to get out of the water.

I see his point. He knew that the kids were in danger and they were, apparently, not aware. His knowledge compelled him to act. But how far does this go?

I got a good grade on a grammar test. I have good knowledge of grammar. Does this mean I should correct every grammatical error I hear or see? Soon, no one would want to be near me!

Would my teacher have been compelled to act if they had been adults? What if they were adults that said "We are aware of the danger but choose to stay here."

Is there really such responsibility and authority? If so, what are its limits?

At this point I doubt that knowledge does carry such authority, but I cannot make a good case, just a lot of examples. I would appreciate any thoughts on the matter.

SIGH! Another company on my personal boycott list!

BP is now on my personal boycott list, along with Exxon (Exxon Valdez), Tyson (mistreatment of employees), and Nestle (marketing of baby formula to poor African women when breast feeding is much better, even after they said that they would stop.)

This is not because BP had an oil drilling accident, but for lack of technical due diligence before and during drilling and lack of honesty and openness (i.e. lying) afterward. This is too bad, because around here there are really only two major gas station brands -- BP and Exxon! I guess I have to use the cheaper, off-brand gasolines.

I did a BAD thing!

Several, actually. On my way to volunteer at the aquarium (good), I stopped at McDonald's (Bad) and ordered three sausage muffins (Bad, bad, bad). I ate them while driving to work (bad). (I think of my volunteering as "work" as it shows my commitment (good).) When I arrived I had a couple of muffin tops left over (good). I left them in the parking lot for the gulls (bad - they should eat their normal wild food!) I enjoyed the antics (badf). One gull snatched a muffin and flew off with it pursued by many gulls trying to get it away. It dropped the muffin but it hadn't fallen more than a foot before it was snagged by another gull. A third gull grabbed it and tried to pull it from the one that had it -- no luck! The current owner was flying around and around, chased by the mob, trying to get bites of it while not letting go of it. They mob finally flew over the trees where I couldn't see them.

No more feeding of wild critters for me (except in a rescue situation).

It seems strange that such a small animal...

...can cause such pain. If I squash it, I can barely see the remains. But if it bites me, it causes swelling, pain and itching for a long time. The poison is very simple, too. HCOOH, or formic acid, is the poison. The critter is a teensy, tiny red ant. It ain't fair!

BTW, in North Carolina red ants are an unwanted invasive alien specie. Red ants go home!

To Chef, or Not to Chef...

Some years ago, when I was thinking of learning to be a chef as a hobby or second career, I had some free time in a hotel. I wandered into the kitchen and a chef was kind enough to talk to me. He had a handful of dill and a sheet pan full of deviled eggs. He was picking off a pinch of dill at a time and centering one on each deviled egg. I decided then and there that I did not want to be a chef.

(There are other reasons as well. As a hobby cook, I cook for whom and when I want. As a "real" or professional chef, I would loose that control over my life.)

Wednesday I was working in horticulture at the aquarium. I was transplanting Lemon Basil seedlings to peat pots. I did about a hundred. The chef and the dill came to mind, but I had a totally different attitude. Sometimes it was a Zen thing, a kind of moving meditation. In any event, these plants will grow and benefit many people over a long period of time. It just *feels* good to do it!

I am not a Moonie, but...

...I may be a Luna-tic. It is amazing the things once notices when one has the time. I have seen the moon an uncountable number of times in the last 60+ years. I have known for a long time that when the opening of the crescent -- the missing part -- is to the right, the moon is decreasing in size (waning.) (The right hand, being stronger, pushes in the moon. Sorry lefties!) When the opening is to the left the moon is increasing in size (waxing.) I have recently noticed that when the moon is near new, just a slim crescent, then the opening is to the top! It makes a certain amount of sense, but I never noticed it or thought of it before!

(Luna is the name of the albino alligator at the aquarium where I volunteer. Thus I am a Luna-tic!)

Where did all that dirt come from?

Being from Minnesota, I am used to dirt and dust all over, especially in the spring. Farmers as far west as the Dakotas are plowing their fields and raising a lot of dust. Prevailing winds carry it to MN, where it can settle gently or splat as mud balls in the rains. I have seen dirt spots two inches across on my car from dirt in the raindrops.

The other morning I saw a lot of dust on my car. I had no idea from where it came. It wasn't just my car as I saw other cars all dusted up. Driving around I saw such cars in other parts of town. I took my car to the car wash and later that day it was dusty again, but not as heavily. It turns out it wasn't dust, it was pollen! The live oaks and a few other trees were in their floral prime and it was very bad. Even I, a sturdy northerner, have come down with hay fever.

It ia supposed to rain this evening and that should was all the pollen out of the air and down the drains. I hope our lives (and cars) will be better tomorrow!

A Zen Moment, of sorts

Last Wednesday I was volunteering at the aquarium horticulture department. I was pulling up kale (a winter decorative plant) and knocking the dirt off the roots, in preparation for planting some spring flowers. I was feeling a little bored and sorry for myself at the repetitive nature of the task. Melanie, the horticulturist, was very happy, excited and energized by the season! We were finally able to plant the flowers we had grown from seeds in the greenhouse! And I was feeling grumpy!

My life seems to be filled with things that can be done, ended or finished. When I change the oil in the car, I am done. When I install some software, I am done. When I fix a plumbing a problem in the house, I am done. When I finish off the basement, I am done.

With a garden though, you are never "done". There is no end. There is always the next season to prepare for. It is a continuous process of creation. It is not something that you are done with, it is something that you do. It takes a totally different mindset, and you receive joy differently.

Some things in life are like a garden. You can receive satisfaction from a long process, watching different flowers bloom in their season. Raising children comes to mind. We can think of it as unpleasant task after unpleasant task, or we can step back and see the growth season after season.

We Are All Connected

I am a recovering alcoholic, dry for over two years now. I am also an atheist. (I prefer to call myself a non-theist, which I consider to be an atheist but atheism is not my religion. Non-thesim has already been taken, though. See Wikipedia.) This presents a problem as Alcoholics Anonymous and other 12-step programs require faith in an undefined Higher Power. It is usually a conventional (e.g. Christian) god, but need not be. I have accepted as my Higher Power the wisdom of the AA (or other 12-step) group.

I have been trying to reconcile this acceptance of a Higher Power and with my understanding of an atheist universe. Many people think that a punishing God is required to enforce "good" behavior, that people will be selfish, if not sociopathic, without the threat of punishment. There is no god in my universe, so I am good simply because I choose to be. I have faults and failings, to be sure, but I do the best I can. If I am wrong, and upon my death I appear before some god, saint, gatekeeper, judge or whatever, I can stand tall and proud and say "I did my best."

I am very comfortable with this belief. I have stopped my searching and readings of philosophy and religion.

But still I felt a gap, a disconnect, between a strictly physical universe and my spiritual well-being. In my first treatment session, "spiritual" was defined as my sense of values, of right and wrong. I accepted that and have built upon it.

I know that what I sew, so I shall reap; that what goes around, comes around. It is not some cosmic force, not some karmic law. It is just that people (and other critters) are usually nicer to folks that are nice to them. There is nothing special going on here.

The following may be my hymn that pulls it all together. I think I can set this issue aside and work on living a Good Life. It came from www.symphonyofscience.com Thanks for reading,